Quest for the perfect family snapshot....

Thursday, October 31, 2013

So this weekend I actually left my house (gasp) I was a good girl and used a mask in crowds and my walker....still over did it

The whole idea was to have a family day to get a few family pics and build memories

 fail and fail

We did nothing I planned

I think I got one useable shot of hubby and Tuffy....none of me and Tuffy and NO family photo at all...

Perhaps it is just a reflection of life....there is no family anymore..just hubby and alone with the mask and walker ( well alone with my illness anyway)

I try....

I do try to create normal family experiences for my son, unlike my girls he doesn't have memories of mommy before the is all he knows... That is good and bad...

good because he doesn't Know the person I was before so he really doesn't have to watch the dragon destroy someone he though was super woman 
 ( as one daughter explained it)

Bad because he will never know that his mommy is a force of nature that would do anything for her kids and heaven help anyone or anything that stands between my kids and happiness...

He won't have the memories of race weekends, or even marathon cooking sessions.... I simply will never do those things again...

These photos are NOT "good" dosent tell the story of a happy family simply shows what it takes to get a couple photos that show we did normal family stuff (99% of the photos my son will NEVER see...he will only see a fun family tradition...not the pain on my face as I try to squat down to his level, not the exhaustion this 3 hour experience including travel time caused, not ever will he know 2 days later I am still in bed recovering....I created a "memory" for him... Someday all he will have are these "memories" that I admit to staging for him... But his sisters have memories with me as part if their childhood and no matter what the cost to me physically he will have those too.... He is young enough I can still keep the convincing photos and get rid of the rest....

Time is precious, when it is all said and done he will grow up knowing me through photos and memories his daddy and sisters tell him...he has no reason to ever know the reality....

So yes, the pics are not what you would expect in a post... But this was the progression of my day... And what just a couple hours of walking and activity created for me.... Hopefully tomorrow I will be up and moving again.... But my reality is you play .... You pay....

And to create a "mommy memory" for my son.... I would do it all over again

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2 Responses to “Quest for the perfect family snapshot....”

  1. You are an inspiration. Your son will have wonderful memories to cherish. I truly admire you.

    1. thanks Isabel... I just try to think of the future at all times... I used to not care about that stuff at I am consumed with making videos, writing letters and tons of pics for the kids (wedding day, the day their first child is born.... trying to cover all the bases just in case)

      Life has simplified a only priority is family now....period